A Cautionary Tale of Hobbies, Hyperfixations, and Half-Finished Projects
I don’t really have casual interests or hobbies — they’re always more like obsessions. A one-track mind, if you will.
I’ve always been an obsessive person by nature, filled with anxiety and endless spirals of “what if’s” and “could be’s.” Those mental loops tend to spill over into my hobbies and passions, too.
Some interests have always been with me: reading, writing, books, Halloween. Those are mainstays in my life — part of my identity.
But then there are the short-lived ones. The interests that completely consume me for a while before fizzling out: decorating and buying stickers for my planner, Lularoe, running, primitive home decor, the Dave Ramsey method, and now — vendor wax (yes, homemade wax melts in a million scents from indie sellers).
These obsessions dominate my brain, my time, sometimes my bank account. I don’t like things. I love them. I dive in, all in — joining Facebook groups, researching, reading, evangelizing. I spend nearly all my free time fixated… until, eventually, I burn out.
Sometimes the obsession circles back (like decorating, which tends to ebb and flow). Other times, it disappears entirely. R.I.P. planner stickers and LuLaRoe.
When I lost weight and took up running, it became the center of my world. I counted calories obsessively, worked out constantly, trained for races. And then I had Caleb — and the interest evaporated. Too tired. Too busy.
A couple of years ago, I dove into debt payoff with Dave Ramsey’s method. I was obsessed. I read finance books every night. Talked everyone’s ear off about budgets and financial freedom. Lately, as you’ve seen in my Debt Diaries, that obsession has resurfaced — which honestly is probably for the best.
Blogging works the same way. Sometimes I’m on fire — writing posts weeks ahead, staying up to date on comments, promoting my blog everywhere. Other times I back off completely and only update once or twice a week. It comes and goes in waves.
I spent all my extra money on planner stickers for a month… then stopped. Then came the Lularoe era. That became my entire wardrobe… until I got bored. None of these were “meh” interests. They were “I’ll spend two hours looking at patterns and joining buy/sell groups” interests. I don’t do lukewarm.
This pattern is just how my brain works: go all in, burn out, move on. It makes focusing on multiple things at once a challenge — because I tend to hyperfixate.
But lately, I’m trying something new: balance.
Right now, I’m trying to be “all in” on a few important areas of my life — debt payoff, weight loss, my blog — without letting one of them take over my entire mental space. I’m trying to tell myself that it’s okay to do my best without going overboard.
I don’t need to pounce on every interest with a full-blown obsession. I don’t need to give 110% to something for it to count.
I don’t HAVE to train for a marathon just to go for a run.
I don’t HAVE to work out every single day or not at all.
I don’t HAVE to eat perfectly to make progress.
I don’t HAVE to give all my energy to one thing — I can divide it among the things that matter.
And most importantly, something doesn’t have to be done obsessively to be worth doing at all.
Right now, the bulk of my time and energy goes to my family and my career — as it should. After that comes the rest: reading, blogging, weight loss, debt repayment. I’m realizing that I can do all of it… if I approach it with the right mindset.
One way I keep it all tied together is through my blog. It lets me write (something I’ve always loved) and talk about everything else I’m working on — finances, fitness, books. That’s why you’ve seen a resurgence in posts like Debt Diaries and Financial Fridays. I’m bringing back weigh-ins and fitness updates, too.
I’m trying to stay grounded — to give all these areas my attention without giving any of them the whole of me. Because when I go too hard in one direction, I lose sight of everything else.
This blog — and my monthly goals — help hold me accountable.
So what’s the point of this post? I guess I’m trying to figure out how my brain works. How to stay focused without getting tunnel vision. How to care deeply without burning out. How to work on all the things that matter to me — without losing myself in the process.
No comments